Fuller Life Stress

It seems that the happier I am, the more stressed out I become.  I think it has to do with attempting to have it all, and not necessarily knowing how to manage it all.

This year, I came up with the 25 things I want to accomplish before I turn 26 and I think it's caused me to be more intentional with my time.  Sure, I still marathon large amounts of Netflix, but I do it while working on my typewriter series (Intro and Week 1) or while knitting (which fits with 22 on my list-Create More).

Today marks the first official day of classes at school and while I'm thrilled to return because it means getting one step closer to the degree I've managed to evade all of these years, I'm also tired.  I wrote about my epic fail with my attempt to CLEP out of Spanish yesterday and that's just one small part of my education this semester this year.  The thing that hurts is how close I was, how close I am, and the fact that I have one more attempt before I need to chuck a couple hundred dollars toward a class that is only good on paper, not in my everyday life.  So this is consuming me.  I'm ignoring my excitement for my online class and having my first class on campus tomorrow, for the first time in over two years!  I'm focusing on this test because not passing means I need a night class that requires me to travel half an hour to and from it three nights a week.

I need to make a better planner system.  Years ago, I created my own, borrowing from hundreds of pins.  The planner I created fit my crazy life (I had four jobs at the time) and left me feeling Zen.  If it wasn't in the planner, it didn't exist.  This year all I have is a monthly calendar and the notebook that contains my 25 goals.  While this is fine for big picture ideas/plans, I need something a little more intensive for managing the minutes on days when I seem to have no time.

 

But I am living a fuller life.  Last weekend I went over to a friend's house and she taught a few of us basic drawing skills.  It was the first time I've hung out with her in entirely too long and the first time I'd done something social in over a month.  I had a fantastic time realizing that I'm a hopeless cause when it comes to drawing/sketching.